Right now I’m doing really well with girls that are clearly below my Sex Rank. I’d say with my natural looks, personality, and lifestyle I’m around a 6 on the scale for men. Basically the way it works is that if a girl is right on your level, you need to use some game to get her, and the higher up she goes above you, the more game you need.
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I currently have 4 girls on my radar that I would classify as 8′s. I am having a lot of trouble breaking through to a point where I can handle these girls with ease. It probably has to do with my look not backing up my cocky vibe enough yet. I really need to figure out fashion. I’m thinking of focusing more on a rocker look with an indie/hipster flare. It’s always best to embody a certain “type” because girls project all kinds of pre-existing fantasies onto you.
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So I’ve written about these four girls here before. Shakira, Crystal, Olivia, and Tomboy. Here’s where I’m at now:
Shakira: She was the one I met first, last New Year’s Eve. I knew nothing about game and was still in a deep depression about my ex, but I got it together and felt kind of cocky that night. I hooked her in by seeming disinterested, and she easily agreed to have dinner with me a few days later.
We had a good date, though I bought her an expensive dinner and then drinks at the bar after. But we had a lot of fun, danced and made out on the dance floor, got some late-night fast food. It pretty much went as well as a “blue pill” (pre-game) date could have gone for me. So I got way too excited and started right back in trying to get her to hang out again. I was texting her almost every day with new ideas for plans, and she kept making excuses. Finally I had to just give up and let it rest for a few months.
Eventually I texted her and said “lets get a drink tonight” and she responded well to my direct attitude. She ended up canceling that night but she immediately offered other plans for the next night. We hung out and had another fun date, make-out at the end, but she wanted to get home and was shy about going to my place or hers.
So we hung out one more time (at her place), and I was really into escalating, even though she had just got home from yoga, felt gross, and (as I discovered with my hand) had not shaved where it counts. She quickly pulled my hand out, and yet I still tried to keep going. I forced the moment way too much instead of showing a willingness to walk away. I seemed needy and desperate, and I have not seen her since.
Basically, I never established much value with this girl. She saw from the start that I was needy, didn’t have a lot of options (whereas she presumably has tons– she’s a struggling actress in LA), and even after I returned with game, I guess I still thought of her as a prize.
After a few half-assed attempts on my part to make plans again, and half-assed excuses on her part with no counter-offer, I finally just said, “Gay.” We hadn’t been in touch since (until tonight). I’d been thinking of trying one more time, but as I’ve said before, a messy frame is very hard to overcome.
So I tried this, thinking of Paul’s “surprise” (dangling a secret) technique. I actually have a family-owned bakery that’s new in town, and if she gets back to me I’ll bring her by. I’m 2 for 2 with girls I’ve brought there before. It’s a massive DHV (display of higher value).
Dagonet: U got a free night this week? ive got something to do and i think youll like it
She didn’t respond, if she does maybe she’ll just write “gay” haha.
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Olivia: I met this girl at a birthday party a few months ago, had an okay interaction and snagged the number, with barely any momentum from the interaction. I texted her a few weeks later and had to remind her who I was, but she was happy to hear from me. Lots of travel and other girls got in the way, and a month after that, I finally suggested plans. She was more than happy to hang, though she had a definite “princess” vibe, saying things like “So where are you taking me?”
Our date was fine but as I wrote about it, I played it far too safe, not leading or taking risks, and generally engaging her logical brain too much. I gave her a last-ditch peck before she left, which might have done more harm than good. At least it shows her my intent, but it also makes me look like a regular exasperated guy.
So I texted her today about movie plans (we’re both into Woody Allen) and she finally got back to me after work. It seems like she legitimately wants to hang again, she keeps working with me to figure out a day and being really upfront about her schedule.
This is good news, she’s probably the only legit prospect left in this bunch.
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Crystal is the girl from the Lobsterfest text fiasco. Basically I ran a solid pickup, got her really attracted and intrigued, and then I just completely over-analyzed the text game to the point of just being not smooth at all. I waited way too long to write her back and then just sent her short, awkwardly bossy responses. She eventually just flaked, and ever since then she’s been almost impossible to get in touch with, not responding to texts.
I finally gave in and Facebooked her, hoping I could run some Krauser-style chat game. Haven’t seen her online at all yet, though.
One of the problems with Crystal, and the next girl Tomboy, is that they’re both 19. That’s also what makes them so sexy, but I can definitely tell they are immature and have tons of guys distracting them.
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Tomboy is the perfect example of a scatterbrained teenager. She responds with quick one-word answers and is impossible to make plans with. Even when she seemingly wants to hang (“Do you want to hang this week?” “Yea when” “Friday night, my friends band is playing” “where” “place” …. radio silence).
The pickup wasn’t super smooth but she seemed intrigued. I probably should have made her name a date when she said “yea when” but I’ve been having mixed results. Sometimes it works better to let the girl name the night first, and sometimes it’s better for you to bring the momentum with a night/event that you can invite her to.
I texted her today to try to turn it around, but I probably back-tracked too much. I might be coming off as try-hard in some of these texts, but it’s definitely an uphill battle no matter what. At a certain point there’s no magic thing you can say, you just need to disappear for a while and show her that you’re not chasing her.
Dagonet: U missed a good show friday. lets just grab a drink this week. what night works for u
Tomboy: (radio silence)
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So there you have it. I definitely notice that I’m much more careful and over-thinking everything once I decide a girl is “above” me. That’s probably what I have to get over the most, just not putting these girls on pedestals, so that I can be myself, show that I’m a man with options who understands women (all true), and increase my value in their eyes.
I also need to be cockier and tease them more. I’m so afraid of offending them that I never really attract them. I need to have an abundance mentality with beautiful women, not just women.
That’s the next step.
Dagonet, how do you feel about day game?
It’s not something I’ve put a lot of practice into, but it’s really useful. Lately I’ve been doing great with pulling sets out of whatever social situations I end up in, with some solo night game here and there.
Don’t feel about radio silence. Texting requires more than game will ever teach you and a lot of it is out of your control. The problem and probably what happened with Tomboy is that these girls get a billion messages a day. Your messages are just some of many and it’s impossible to keep the girl going.
If you’re going to text keep it simple and short:
1) Feeler text
2) Time and place for meeting
3) Confirmation
That’s it. Also, don’t completely write out calling. Call a girl the first time to arrange a date. If she doesn’t answer, text her in a few days. A lot of times you will leave a message and get a text back, so just go from that.
Yeah lately I’ve been trying to follow the Roosh text model, which you pretty much just described. I kind of feel like calling is dead, I think it just makes you too vulnerable and you seem too interested. Better to minimize risk and time investment, and stick with texting. Civilization is on the decline…
“At a certain point there’s no magic thing you can say, you just need to disappear for a while and show her that you’re not chasing her.”
This is very true!
although she should be chasing you from day 1.. its so much easier that way
Agreed… It’s amazing when I compare this to the shit I’m doing right now with Aggressive Asian, who I was a cocky asshole to from the start, and who I banged on the first date.
Dagonet: Okay come over friday night no grandma shirts this time
(she responds with some “witty” comeback but her pussy is tingling hard)
When I get ‘radio silence’ from a girl, I’ll tet her back with disappointment ‘Cat got your tongue, sucks to hear that’.
There was one text exchange I had with a girl – I asked if she was coming out for a friend’s birthday party. She didn’t respond so after 3 hours I wrote this:
Me: ‘fag’
Her: (5 minutes later) ‘sorry about that, are you going?’
Me: ‘Yeah, I’m down. It’s right outside your house, you’d better show your ass up!’
Her: ‘I don’t know if I can make it out, I got work to do’
Me: ‘Not even for 30 minutes? Girl, get your shit done and take a break by coming out for a bit. Then you head back to your cave’
Her: ‘Haha ok I’ll be there’
She did show up and we talked for a bit. She stayed for 2 hours. I had no interest in doing anything with her anyway, I just pushed her buttons and she came through. When I seiously want a girl to do something, I’ll go overboard and put some pressure on her because I don’t give a shit what the outcome is. If the girl shows up, she’s closer to getting some dick. If not, I’ll be disappointed. It’s my belief to say that Beta boys will say ‘ok that’s fine have a good time’ whereas Alpha guys will say ‘haha what a lame excuse, take care’.
If I were you, I’d send a blank text to Tomboy just to piss her off. Crystal = I don’t know, I would text her some night and ask what she’s doing, and then suggest you wanna hang out. Since these 2 are both 19, your best bet is to throw a house party with a bunch of alcohol involved. Girls under the age limit love getting drunk and getting away with it.
Any other girls who are 21 or over, pick them up and go bar hopping some night. Change venues around. Invite your friends out so you can run social proof, or just talk to new girls while she’s present.
“So where are you taking me” Response: “To Wonderland, Alice”
One thing about the underage girls, these are ingenues in Los Angeles, they have fake IDs and even if they didn’t, they’d have no problem getting access wherever they want. These girls are the epitome of spoiled, fawned-over brats. Not their fault, all the male attention just makes them that way. My job is to break through it.
I’ve had a couple good results pushing back when a girl cancels, but only when I had pre-established value. If I’m on the border or below, I think it comes off as needy and pushes them further away.
Well then, these girls have a shitload of options. They have no chance of ‘girlfriend material’, so if you had any thought of that, throw it away.
Since you’ve made attempts at hanging out with them, and they didn’t come through, you could switch it around and let THEM call some shots. What I mean is, text Shakira some night and ask “Hey, you going out? I’m free for the time being”. Let her invite you out. You’ll most likely meet some of her guy/girl friends, but it won’t matter. The goal is to just have fun, forget the notch. Don’t cling onto her or her friends. Walk around, meet new girls. You can PICK UP your value by just being fun and entertaining, which’ll make you look aloof.
That’s the route I play. But my game goes way up when I take the girl of interest out on the dance floor. I can read her easier and figure out whether she’s into me or not. That’s when I decide to kiss her or just keep it casual.
The word “just” hurt you with her. It sends a message of chasing, negotiating, along these lines: “If you won’t invest in spending the evening with me listening to my friend’s bank, how about you just invest in a drink with me”. Also “what night works for u” sends the message that you’re free every or almost every night of that week. “How’s Wed?” is better.
I think KauserPUA is great at text/facebook chat game. Right combo of push and pull. Unlike many he does do a fair bit of rewarding.
Yeah, you make some good points. I find in general it’s better to leave it open until the girl picks a night, that way you have her locked in more. You preserve your value in your response… The best case scenario (which just happened today with Shakira) is that she responds with 2 options. Then you can say “Nah I have plans ____, let’s do ____.” You show you’re busy, but now you have a date.
Text game has almost become more important than regular game now. How can you game a girl if you can’t even get her to go out with you? Girls give out their numbers like candy, so its easy for them to ignore you. Makes same night bangs more appealing, but I’m not giving up yet.
Phoenix and Doug1 have some great points. Always be firm and suggest a specific time and place. Dealing with radio silence is the hardest though, but I’m definitely trying either ‘fag’ or ‘gay’ next time.
I love this:
‘Not even for 30 minutes? Girl, get your shit done and take a break by coming out for a bit. Then you head back to your cave’
I could have used that before.
Haha yeah there are so many different aspects to all of this. Everyone is making good points…
Not to toot my own horn, but I might have just hit it on the head a little further up this thread with the value aspect.
When your value is high with a girl, none of this shit matters.
When your value is low with a girl, none of this shit matters.
When you’re in the middle, it’s random.
So is it really worth obsessing over the “perfect way to text”?
Just make sure your value is high when you meet her and leave the interaction at a high point (leave her wanting more) and you’ll have smooth sailing 90% of the time.
You are right and that’s why quantity matters. I have to get the point where saying “Next!” really means there is one immediately available. I’ve been giving up too soon when I get radio silence so I’ve never had more than 2 or 3 prospects at once. That’s nearly enough.
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I really like your text phoenix…I will use them whenever I got that radio silence from mine gf..
http://www.datehottergirls.com/